Stork Craft Baby Crib Recall

I am not a happy Mama right now. Abby's crib is most likely one of the ones included in the huge recall of baby cribs manufactured by Stork Craft. It seems that babies have suffocated because of design flaws in millions of cribs, including many bearing the Fisher Price logo. I've read blog posts and articles about this off and on all day today and I am troubled by a couple of things. The whole situation is troubling of course, but there are a lot of factors that really bug me. The main thing I see is that there seems to be some confusion as to exactly what the recall is for. As far as I can tell, there are actually two seperate recalls going on.

The first round of recalls that happened in January had to do with the metal brackets. I've read many comments from parents all over the web today saying that they have yet to get the replacement brackets from Stork Craft from that recall. There is now another issue with the dropside mechanism itself. Many of the cribs have cheap plastic guides that allow the side to go up and down with one hand to be handy for when you’re holding a baby. Our crib has this. But if these become worn,or damamged the dropside can come loose, creating an entrapment hazard. One thing we noticed on our crib is that if the side is lifted too high and not reseated properly, the dropside comes loose at the top. We had accidently lifted our side too high one night, and thankfully we noticed and fixed it.

I've seen a few comments from people who have said that the bracket issue happens when the brackets are not installed properly and become fatigued. However, that is not the only issue. It’s not just about the metal brackets and not everyone having a problem is having it because they’ve made assembly errors. Stork Craft is at fault here, not consumers. There is a video that clearly shows both issues here.

In addition to a lack of clarity about what the potential problems actually are in this recall, there are two other things that really bug me. First of all, these cribs were being produced as long ago as 1993. That's 16 years, folks. Where has the CPSC been all this time? In an article today the head of the CPSC states that they didn't move quickly enough on this issue. You can read that here.

The other thing that disturbs me is this. Why on Earth would any company use such cheap plastic to build the drop side mechanism in the first place? It's obviously critical to function AND safety, so why use such cheap materials? And trust me, it's cheap. When we assembled our crib we all commented on how flimsy the drop side mechanism seemed to be.

In light of all of this, I will definitely NOT be purchasing any Stork Craft product ever again. I just came across this video that someone had posted the link to, and it involves eliminating the drop side hazard using the conversion kit sent out to consumers. I'm posting it here because it also clearly shows the dangers presented when there are drop side issues.

Please pass this information along to anyone you know who might be affected.

Google Me

I was viewing statistics for my blog traffic recently and came across some interesting Google searches that led people to my blog. Here are a couple I thought were kind of neat.

A search for "Diane Dengel criticism" took readers to this post about a favorite family item I have from my childhood home.

A search for "preserving ultrasound pictures" took readers to this post about (you guessed it) preserving ultrasound pictures.

This is one of the things I find really cool about blogging and the Internet in general, and that is the interlacing of interests and information. I sure am happy to have my Internet connection back!

Aspen's New Dresser

It's not new. But it's new to Aspen and that's what matters. It was an answer to a prayer. We acquired this little dresser a few days ago when someone left it in the bulky item disposal area in our complex. The top drawer was broken, and there were no drawer guides in it. It was surrounded by several other dressers. They were bigger and more ornate, but I chose this one because it reminds me of a dresser I had as a little girl back in the mid-1970's, and I knew it was meant for Aspen as soon as I saw it. Since she was a baby, I've been storing her clothes in several baskets in the closet. That worked just fine until recently. Now that she is older and has more clothes, the baskets just weren't cutting it. Since I knew we wouldn't have the extra money to buy a dresser, I just put the need up in prayer, knowing that it would be met in some way or the other. A simple need, filled by God. My hubby fixed the drawer and even saved us the few dollars it would have cost to buy drawer guides by making them himself. The result is wonderful. The dresser is as good as new, and Aspen couldn't be more pleased with it. She organized her clothes into it all by herself and has taken great pleasure in going in and out of it to select what to wear and put things away, more baby steps toward independence.

Pieces of Our Hearts

"He puzzled and puzzed, til his puzzler was sore..."
Dr. Suess, How The Grinch Stole Christmas

My parents were here for a visit last week. The day before they arrived, Ashley and I had pulled out one of our puzzles to work on. We assembled to border and some of the picture and left it out on the dining room table just as we do with all our puzzles. This particular one is one of our favorites, a Charles Wysocki painting titled "Everyone Love's A Mystery". We love it because it's really beautiful and because it inspires the writer in both of us. On the front of the cottage is a sign that reads "Bookworm's Hideout". As we worked the puzzle the first time last fall, we talked about how it would be really neat to have a little place like that to escape to in order to write.

It turns out we weren't the only ones who fell in love with it. My Dad started fiddling with it shortly after they arrived and spent about 90% of the time they were here working on it. He was totally hooked and even when he got frustrated with the tougher parts, he still couldn't drag himself away. He and my mom and I had some great conversation around the table while I worked on it too and she played with Abby or drew turkey hands with Aspen. It was such a great way to spend time together and we all really enjoyed it. Dad said later that it was a great way to spend his vacation, allowing him to unwind after a busy few weeks at home.



Precious time with family is really on my heart these days. I'm not sure why except to say that it feels much like a desire put there by the Lord. There are some things in life that take hold of me and I just know they're a message from the Lord. My desire to get close to my roots and to cultivate some continuity in life for me and my children is definitely one of them. I've come to realize lately how much love and wisdom I have cheated myself out of by being distant from family. At times the distance has been both physical like living thousands of miles away in Colorado, and emotional, like at the beginning of my pregnancy with Abby when I felt I had no one's blessing in my family. It turns out I was mistaken about that, but that's a post for another time.

Working that puzzle together turned out to be a really special time that I will never forget. My parents are in their late 70's, so I really don't know how many more chances I'll have to truly be with them on the level that we were around the table. I'm thankful for the experience itself and for the gift of knowing how precious those times really are.

Too Young To Be A Mom

Sometimes I feel like I am a mom for the first time. With Aspen, age 4 and Abby, 3.5 months, I am a stay-at-home mom for the first time. When my older girls were so little I worked full-time, and they were cared for by my hubby's mom who ran her own home daycare. She was great with all the kids and I felt so lucky to have someone I trusted to care for the girls. Looking back now I realize I didn't appreciate her nearly enough. I can't imagine how she managed a handful of kids all day long every day. She has a gift for it though, and has a real magic about her when it comes to dealing with kids.

That's not a gift that I have been blessed with. I love my kids and I am thrilled to have the chance not only to have a second set of kids, but also to be able to be home with them. This was something I only dreamed of when the big girls were little. But this stay-at-home mom gig is a lot harder than I thought it would be. I thought it was a lot harder with just Aspen at first. Now I know better. That was a breeze compared to handling two little ones all day. Some days I love it, other days I wonder if I am doing a good job.

No matter what kind of day it is, one thing is certain. I could not get through most days without the help of Ashley, my #2 daughter who is 17. I've written before about what an incredible helper she is. She is in so many ways, a second mom to the little girls, and especially to Aspen. She is incredibly mature for her age and really takes her role as my helper to heart. She always goes above and beyond the call of duty as far as I am concerned.

That's just the problem though. Since she is home schooled, she is home pretty much 24/7 just like I am. Because we live across town from most of her friends, she doesn't have much of a social life right now. We're at a point where she has said to me more than once that she feels more like a mom than a teenager. I feel bad about that, and I know it needs to change. I'm not sure exactly how to do that, but I am trying to take steps in that direction.

I'm working on the routine still, and reaffirming discipline with Aspen. We've carved out time for Ashley's schoolwork by having Aspen also do school type things or chores with me so she isn't a distraction. If Abby naps during that time that's great. If not, it's a bit of a challenge for me to juggle both little ones. This is something I don't have much experience with, but I'm working on it. Our bedtime routine is down to a system that works. Ashley plays with Aspen while I get Abby to sleep and then Aspen and I have our private time together, and usually watch a video while she winds down to bedtime. This frees Ashley to have computer time or just to hang out in her room, child free.

Our system isn't perfect and things are tough right now with so much company coming in and out for the holidays. My parents were here, then my hubby's brother and right now our oldest is here visiting until after Thanksgiving. All of these disruptions have resulted in a lot of whining and clinginess in Aspen and that's been stressful and a strain on the routine.

My fear is that all of this is putting a strain on my relationship with Ashley and that has me really worried. Tonight during a stressful moment she said that she feels like she gives and gives and gets nothing in return. While that isn't true in the strictest sense, she does have a point in many ways. I understand completely how she feels, and it bothers me that I can't seem to get a handle on things and cut her loose more. I think about it all the time, and pray for guidance and the strength to manage with less help from her.

Any suggestions you folks have for me are certainly welcome!

The Old Place

I wanted to share my joy with all my readers. Today I received my copy of my Grandma's book, The Old Place in the mail from the library in Wilmington. It has been such a treat to see it! As I said in prior posts on this, I'm not sure how the library acquired the copy of it, but they have it on display with their North Carolina history collection. This is one of the copies I had actually seen before, as I recognize the cover art. It brought such a smile to my face, and such joy to my heart to see it again, even as a photocopy, after all of these years. Whoever did the copying did a fabulous job, and it is very clear.



The cover art of this one was a rub-on that Grandma found at a local craft shop. She used these on all the copies, but just about every one was different if I remember correctly. Or there may have been batches of them that would have looked the same. Looking at this one, it's obvious it was a later one. It's in great condition, and you can see on the cover how the lettering is not perfect. That would have been due to my Grandmother's vision problems later in life. Also, on the inside of the front cover, she had penned the following in cursive: "A true story of life in the country - (Carolina country) by Wilma Stanley Gore."



The handwriting is unmistakably hers, and similar to the way she wrote when she was well into her 70's. The text of the book is her own hand as well, printed neatly. Some corrected mistakes are present in the later pages. She made photocopies of the original handwritten pages for distribution over the years, and the writing we see would have been from the mid to late 1970's I believe. I am about halfway through reading the 90-page book, and my heart is filled with warmth and comfort. So many things that she says touch my heart in a special way. In one passage she recalls her mother making soap, something I love to do. She also calls her mother a "nester", and paints a lovely picture of Fall on their small farm as they would prepare for winter. It seems that her mother was just the sort of woman I used to aspire to be when I would daydream as a young girl of someday being a wife, mother and homemaker. I'm planning to make additional copies for family members for the holidays, and this has also inspired some family history projects I want to tackle, so I will keep everyone posted on how that all goes.

Happy Birthday Grandma!

Today at Thankful Thursday, Iris writes a touching post about her Dad. I'd like to write about family today too, particularly my Grandmother. She is 100 years old today. 100 years! It's incredible to me to think that when she was born in was 1909.

Today someone asked me what her secret is, and all I can say is unswerving Christian faith. In her younger days, she rarely missed church, sang in the choir and spoke often of her beliefs. The Bible says in Romans 6:23: For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord. I believe this can be true of long life on Earth as well. My mother often refers to my Grandmother as a prayer warrior, someone with what always seems to be a direct line to the Lord. We're told that the Lord hears the prayers of the righteous, and my Grandmother is a shining example of this. She has been an inspiration to me in my own walk with Jesus, and although I don't get to see her as often as I would like, she often comes to mind in tough times, and I find myself thinking of what she would do or say in a similar situation. Verses of scripture and other things she's shared with me over the years always come to mind.

Grandma is also one of a long line of women in our family with a passion for writing. In my recent post A Treasured Legacy, I wrote about how her mother before her was a teacher and published writer. Grandma followed in her footsteps, and wrote a book called The Old Place in the mid-1970's. It was all about her childhood home and memories. After trying unsuccessfully to get published by a publishing company, she did it herself. She made copies of her original handwritten manuscript, had them bound with plastic spiral binding and decorated the pages by hand with decorative rub-on images. She handed them out to family and friends, churches and other places she frequented. Everyone who read it agreed, the publishers who rejected it lost out.

In that prior post, I also mentioned that no one in the family still has a copy of the book. However I had learned that the public library in Wilmington, where she lived most of her life, had a copy in their North Carolina collection. On Monday I was able to speak with someone there, who agreed to copy it for me and mail the copy to me. I am so excited and can't wait to read it again and share it with my family. I am hoping to receive it in time to include in the the holiday gifts I'm sending to my parents, brothers and sister.

In the meantime, I'm taking the time to share more of our family history with my girls, so that even when Grandma does pass away, her legacy will remain.

A Treasured Legacy

Today I learned that my passion for writing is a gift that has been handed down through the generations of my family. I always knew that most of the women on my mother's side of our family loved to write, but I didn't know the actual lineage of our itch until today. It seems that my Great Grandmother Missouri Blanche Stanley, a school teacher, had an article published in Ladies Home Journal sometime in the early 1900's. As near as my mom and I could figure out, it would have likely been sometime between 1909 when my Grandmother was born, and 1921 when Missouri passed away. Today I embarked on the first leg of a marvelously exciting adventure, trying to track down a copy of that article. Can you imagine a more delicious piece of family history to discover? It gives me goosebumps to think of a woman all those years ago, whom I never met, but who shared not only my bloodline but also the drive to put pen to paper.

My Grandmother, Missouri's daughter Wilma Stanley, was born in 1909 and is still living. She will be 100 years old on the 19th of this month. I'll be doing a tribute post about her on her birthday. She was a school librarian and also a passionate writer and actually completed a 90-page book of handwritten memoirs. She made photocopies and had them spiral bound, and distributed them herself to family and friends over the years. My mom told me today that as far as she knows no one in the family still has a copy, so while I was hunting for info on Missouri's article I Googled my Grandmother's name and the title of the book, The Old Place. In so doing, I learned that the library in Wilmington, NC where she used to live and where we lived with her for a while, has a copy! I am so excited about this, I can't even express it in words. I sent out messages to some of my old friends who still live there asking if anyone would be willing to make a copy for me. I also plan to call the library on Monday (they're closed on Sunday) and see about getting a copy. This too, could be such a treasured heirloom keepsake and source of inspiration for all of us.

The roll call of writers in the family includes just about every female descendant from those two ladies, including myself and my girls. It's something I really want to nurture in my kids and still continue to pursue myself. I'll keep y'all posted on that, as well as my search for more information on these lost treasures.

The Smile Says It All

Wordless Wednesday

Aspen's Chores

Today I have to take a minute to brag about Aspen. Now that we have the Internet back in the house, she has been enjoying playing on some of her favorite preschool sites, like Nick Jr.com and a few others. I let her spend a lot of time on there over the weekend but that's not a habit I want to start, obviously. So today we started a new program in our home where she has chores to do and she earns computer time for each one. She embraced the idea quickly and has already earned lots of time for running laundry, folding laundry, loading the dishwasher, sweeping and mopping the kitchen floor and helping clean the kitty box. She needed a little help with these, obviously but I think within a week or so she will be able to do them on her own. I was pleased with how well she did for only being four. Needless to say I was really proud of her, and thrilled to have some more help around the house. I made a big deal of adding up her time and she was excited to learn she had earned two hours. When all was said and done though, she told me, "Mommy, I like cleaning with you because I get lots of attention."

My sweet, sweet little girl.....

Special Thanks

True friends are such a blessing. I wanted to take some time today to say a special thank you to my dear friend Farrah at Baby Love Slings for the amazing and generous gift she recently gave me. After reading my post Working Together, she had this to say in my comments:

Melinda~
I have read your last few posts and have been praying for you and your family. I know you must feel so much emotion about all that is going on and I just pray that God would calm your heart and speak peace to your soul.
Your love for ALL your girls is evident in all that you do, even the hard things. Maybe even especially the hard stuff. Give yourself grace and know that God is working on you and Kelly and has the whole situation in the palm of His hand.

Oh, and in praying for you I feel like God is telling me to give you a sling. Not that it will change things for you but maybe it will brighten your day a bit and every little bit helps, right? :) I have a green pattern with flowers that I would be glad to give you. E-mail me your address and I'll get it out to you ASAP. :)

Blessings!
Farrah

Just a few days later the most amazing and wonderful gift arrived in my mailbox: a beautiful sling! I couldn't wait to try it out and Abby and I both love it. It helped a lot with Abby's fussiness and colic and really made a difference for me throughout my day. Wearing Abby allows me to comfort her and tend to her need for closeness while still getting chores done and more importantly, spending quality time with Aspen, our four-year-old. I always knew Farrah's slings were special, just by the passion with which she writes about them, but I really am impressed with the quality and the attention to detail that is obvious in the construction of the sling and the instructions for it's use. That, plus just knowing it was made with love, makes it so much better than those store bought, mass produced baby carriers.

If you'd like to learn more about babywearing, please visit Farrah's site today. I also highly recommend her blog. She is talented, insightful, passionate and real and this all shine through in her writing, as does her strong faith and her love for her adorable little boys.

Thank you Farrah!

Overdue Update

We finally have Internet back in our house, on our main computer! It's been a while since my last update, but if anyone is passing through, please feel free to stop in, pull up a chair and hang out for a while. I'll serve some tea and fill you in on all the goings on here at Shore's End.

Where to begin? There is so much. Since I last posted, changes have happened, decisions have been made and milestones have been reached. The leaves have turned, the season has changed and we are only about 8-10 days from the time a year ago when little Abby was conceived. How can it have already been a year? This time last November, she was but a daydream I indulged in idle moments, a desire that I thought would go unfulfilled. Life was so very different then.

Kelly has moved out. She is now living with Shawn's parents and is doing very well there. She has joined a new church, which she loves and called me Sunday night all giddy and excited because she is going to be a part of forming a study group for young people ages 17 or so up to early 20's like her. She is thrilled and believes this was God's plan all along. I'm happy that she's happy. Regarding her possibly leading the group, I am cautiously optimistic. If that's the Lord's will He'll guide her, as long as she lets Him. Like me, she has the tendency to rush ahead and do things for herself, instead of being patient and waiting on divine guidance. Since she has moved out, things have settled down quite a bit here. There is less conflict and more unity. I miss her, but not the constant battles that come with us trying to cohabitate.

Ashley is still my greatest helper. As I said in a prior post, she cooks, she cleans, she plays with Aspen and cares for Abby. Whatever I need her to do at the moment she is willing to do. I love her for it. I love her anyway, of course. But I love her even more now, and appreciate her in ways I never expected. It's getting old for her though, the role of almost-homemaker. She says she feels more like a mom than a teen, and so I am working hard to find more balance in our daily lives, and more time for her to live her life. This week we're getting back on track with her school. We've let it slide a lot since this year started, due to general chaos in the house. Things are calmer now though and it's time to get going again. She'll be starting Algebra 2 and English 12 this week.

Aspen has made amazing strides forward recently. My pregnancy with Abby took so much out of my physically and emotionally that I had slipped into a mode of "armchair parenting" (as Jo of Supernanny would call it). I had really slipped into taking the path of least resistance with her in regards to discipline, and it was really showing in her behavior. Thankfully that is really turning around now that I am back to being the proactive mom that I normally am. Within the last two weeks she has given up a lot of her baby habits that I was allowing to linger on, and although it was hard on everyone in the house at first, she has done really well. I am so proud of her. Right now we are working on getting into a normal bedtime routine, vs. our former odd hours. Our old routine worked for us before, but now we need something more structured, for every one's benefit.

Aspen also faced her separation anxiety head on last Friday, when she had to have some minor outpatient surgery. I was dreading it for weeks, imagining her kicking and screaming as they dragged her away from me. Such was not the case at all though. We talked to her ahead of time, explaining that they would take her back there, and give her some "sleepy meds" and when she woke up we would be with her. I think she thought I meant we would be with her during the surgery too, and I let her think that just to avoid unnecessary fear for her, since she'd be out cold and have no idea that we weren't right there the whole time. She did so well. They gave her a drink with a sedative before taking her, and she was calm and smiling when they collected her. When we were reunited about two hours later she was so out of it she didn't even realize that we hadn't been there the whole time. The nurses and the doctor all said she was so sweet and a great patient. I was so proud.

Abby is such a joy. She is three months old now, and smiling and cooing. She is also talking in her own amazing way. We have several phrases that we say to her, and she has learned to mimic the sounds and pitch of our voices and the words are so close to perfect it's startling when she does it. And completely charming too. She can "say" hi, hello and love you. It's the cutest and most amazing thing ever. I'll try to get a video soon to post, for everyone reading this going, three month old babies can't talk.

Abby is a much happier baby lately. Her colic has faded and she sleeps well, nurses well and is very interactive. She watches everyone and everything and comments on it all in her own adorable language. She is very particular about certain things. She will not stay in a wet or soiled diaper for more than a few minutes before protesting, loudly. She sleeps on her tummy, and only on her tummy. Somebody is cringing, I know. I'm aware of SIDS statistics concerning babies' sleep positions and our doc reminds us at every visit. Try telling that to Abby. It's ironic too because she doesn't much care for tummy time when she's awake. She'd much rather stand. Nope, not kidding. Her favorite thing is for us to hold her hands and let her stand on her feet. I'm in awe of how long she can do it before her little legs give out. She may just walk before she crawls.

In other news, things on the marriage front have improved in some ways. I can't comment on this too much here, except to say this. Things are better than they were, partly because my hubby is trying harder and partly because I am back on my feet again and less hypersensitive than I was while pregnant. On the other hand, I have a different perspective on it all than I did before. My take on things is very straightforward these days. I see things more for what they really are, and my days of making excuses for my mate and blaming myself for our problems are done. At this point, it is what it is. What it will become, well...that's up to God.

Before my blogging dry spell I mentioned that Shawn had started job hunting in Virginia. I'm sad to say that so far that has gone nowhere. Of course, long distance job hunting in this kind of economy is probably a lost cause anyway. He is on board with moving though, and that's a really good thing. It's nice to finally be in agreement on something big. After the holidays we'll get back to planning and working on that goal.

In the meantime we're all looking forward to making this holiday season special, since all the holidays will be Abby's firsts. Now that we have the Internet back in our home (praise God!), I'm hoping to blog regularly again. I'm looking forward to sharing the holiday season with all my bloggy friends again. Hugs and blessings to you all.

Y'all come back now, ya hear?